Well, “love” might not be quite the right word, perhaps “relief” is more appropriate. I have learned that I am not alone. Other parents I know look forward to that peaceful Monday morning in the office. Free of taxiing, hours of poolside or fieldside or rinkside attendance. Cleaning, laundry, cooking, helping with that big homework project that really should have been done a week ago. Shall I go on?
My work week is packed with meetings and activities. I can at times be triple booked but it can’t compare to the weekend schedule. Last weekend we juggled a three-day swim meet and a full day gymnastics meet. I felt like I was sprinting through the entire weekend. I call it the “three ring circus.” With my kids ages, 14, 12 and 3 it’s a form of jujitsu to get everyone where they need to be. And on top of that, make sure the little one still gets a nap, bath, isn’t forgotten at the side of the road etc.
Weekends are funny things. On the one hand I look so forward to Friday evenings and that “start of the weekend” feeling. On the other, there is always a sense of failure. That I didn’t get done what I was aiming to that week. Fridays tend to be a good catch up day but I always underestimate how much “catching up” I can reasonably expect to do. On top of that,
I have a strange fantasy that I can somehow get some hours of work in on the weekend.
Thank God It’s Monday!
What is the definition of insanity? Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results? My thinking brain tells me the weekend work thing is elusive but my non-rational brain always hopes for something different…
here comes the insanity again.
To be truthful, the only weekends I can get any work done are those long gymnastics or swim-meet weekends. I secretly covet all that down time so I can immerse in my backlog for uninterrupted hours. If you aren’t familiar with the meet thing, you attend the event for five to six hours but your kid is performing for mere minutes. That equals a whole lot of idle time.
As I read this it sounds really unbalanced that I am coveting a few hours for work on the weekend but I don’t think I am alone. A friend of mine who works at a major health insurer often pulls up her laptop in the stands, right there with all the other parents surrounding her. I check around her for dirty looks but I don’t see anything. Perhaps because she is one of the nicest people on the planet.
Strangely enough this gives me hope and courage.
A Mom Guilt Moment
Sometimes I feel that I need to be more social at my kids’ events and I probably should but it’s precious time and I am unwilling to give up to six hours on a weekend for parent socializing. Don’t get me wrong, I really like to meet the parents and some of them have become dear friends but when I steal away to a cafe during a two-hour break, I do feel that pang of guilt that I am not doing all that I can to be part of the social fabric.
I am a natural introvert, which makes it even more difficult for me to break into those tight parent circles. Last weekend I set out a goal for myself to meet new parents. I approached one mom and said “are you ____’s mom? She said “yes” so I introduced myself. Within 30 seconds, she told me that she doesn’t socialize with the other parents and “keeps to herself.” That she is happy to just support her child and not get involved with the other parents “less drama that way.” I pretty quickly wrapped up, said “well nice to meet you” and with my tail between my legs, returned to my little spot on the bleachers five rows down.
I was simultaneously shocked, impressed and a little envious.
To Wrap This Up
I totally get where she is coming from. Sometimes it’s just easier to keep to yourself and not get involved. She clearly had no guilt around it at all.
But for me as in all things, it’s how to strike that balance. I do what I can to be friendly and connect but when I find myself staring into space, it’s time to breakout the laptop.
Weekends are great but they are also hard. We have good family time but they physically and mentally exhaust me. I wouldn’t give them up but when I am running hard all the way to Sunday night….TGIM!
Thank God it’s Monday!
Totally feel this way. ESPECIALLY when my kid was 2 omg.